Only a mothe r could love this liver
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Randomize
