Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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