do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
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