is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize