im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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