Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
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