I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
my sisters under your porch take her home
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
