Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize