Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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