Soap is not a condiment
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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