If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Randomize
