Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
