Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
