I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Fuck appropriateness.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
