I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
