just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
