I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
