You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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