I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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