Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
