i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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