Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
organizing the empties. That sober.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
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