Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Randomize
