i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
