I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I'm sobbing to NWA
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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