The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
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My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
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Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
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