is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
The power of my boobs compel you
wow bdsm is so cute
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
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