grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
