she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
True strength comes from lack of pants
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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