Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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