My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
