is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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