I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
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He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
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I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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