YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Randomize
