they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
