I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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