Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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