i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
