I look better un-naked...
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
