I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
