were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
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It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
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The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
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