And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
