I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
My ass is underappreciated
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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