Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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