5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
well you can't waste a boner
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
