u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
