Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
