THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
