You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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