fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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