I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
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